Leading the Rising Proletarian Tide to Victory

Hi, Sorry I've Not Been Around Much Lately

2009-03-29T09:37:54Z

It's just that, there's someone else. You're still important to me, 'cos we've been through so much together, but all the action's going on at the other place these days. The other place is prettier, and lets me have a blog roll, and embed videos and stuff more easily. Though linking can be a bugger.

Look I've got my things, if you need me I'll be over there. OK?

Solidarity with the Occupation

2009-03-11T15:21:14Z

No, not that one. Well, yes, obviously that one too.

But I meant this one, which is also an occupation, although not quite in the same way, and it is related to the other occupation, so I can see how you may have got confused.

Let me start over.

A coalition of about 25 Left students at Newcastle University have been occupying the Fine Arts lecture theatre since last night, demanding that the university support the Palestinians, divest its investments in the arms trade, boycott Israeli academics and goods, and raise awareness of the Palestinian cause, amongst other things. Send them a message of support, or simply visit the blog. There have been reports of violence being used on them by University security staff so you might want to complain about that too.

CiF Poster So Thick It's Worth a Quick Point 'n' Laugh

2009-03-05T20:27:16Z

First comment below Billy Bragg's Graun piece today, right below this:

Without powerful unions to protect them, the wages of ordinary workers were held in check while the cost of housing began to spiral upwards. As it became increasingly difficult for first-time buyers to get on the property ladder, a newly deregulated banking sector began offering ever more "attractive" loans. And we all know where that led.
Would any of this have been different if Thatcher had lost that titanic struggle in 1984?

We have prize-winning thicko 'harryboy' with this:

If the Miner's strike was the cause of this economic crisis, doesn't it mean Arthur Scargill is the real culprit ?

Yeah, harryboy, and you know who I blame for Pinochet? That bastard Allende.

Support Prisme Workers of Dundee

2009-03-04T22:09:23Z

Prisme workers of Dundee have occupied their factory after they were made redundant with 1 day's notice. Send messages of support to 07882804212 or email christinaf1956@hotmail.com

PASS THIS INFO ON!

Craig Murray Needs YOU

2009-03-04T20:52:33Z

Craig Murray, former British Ambassador to Uzbekistan, whistleblower on torture and all-round hero, MAY have the chance to present evidence to the Parliamentary Joint Committee on human rights on the 10th March, IF they decide his evidence is worth hearing.

Convince them it is. Craig says:

The government is lobbying hard for my exclusion. I need everybody to send an email to jchr@parliament.uk to urge that I should be allowed to give evidence. Just a one-liner would be fine. If you are able to add some comment on the import of my evidence, or indicate that you have heard me speak or read my work, that may help. Please copy your email to craigjmurray@tiscali.co.uk.

Please also pass on this plea to anyone you can and urge them to act. Help from other bloggers in posting this appeal would be much appreciated.

Thanks.

Brilliant Headlines, Vol 16

2009-02-28T15:17:33Z

'Drinking Problems Rife in Orchestras'

Rarely has a headline seemed so mysterious, so seedy, and yet at once so ripe with promise...

Pebbles, Landslides

2009-02-24T20:40:41Z

Thanks to this, I'm going to be watching this over the next few days. Might be fun. Miiiiiiight be one of them interweb phenomenononons you hear so much about.

Wouldn't want to miss that...

Tell the BNP to Fuck Off

2009-02-18T15:45:07Z

Or at least, ask the Merseyside Chief Constable to ban their mass rally in Liverpool.

Petition here:
http://action.hopenothate.org.uk/page/s/stophate

I'm sure I don't need to point out the potential harm these racist scumbags can do. Go on, sign the petition!

Who the Fuck is Patricia Morgan?

2009-02-18T14:31:14Z

Via the Daily Quail, I read this piece of Fail ~~journalism~~ ~~hackery~~ depressingly deplorable column-inch filling:

Teachers should tell boys the joys of teen fatherhood, government advice reveals

So far, so yawnsome made-up anti-Labour bullshit. The weird bit is the 'researcher on teenage parenthood' they wheel out later in the piece for the following rent-a-quote:

'Fatherhood before the age of 16 should be a matter for the police.

'The parents of teenagers involved should be charged with neglect for allowing them to sleep together under their roof.

'This is child abuse. After 16, fathers who want to help bring their children up should be given one piece of advice: Get a job.'*

I have to ask, who would accept someone's description of themselves as a 'researcher' if this is the level of commentary that they're offering? It's the equivalent of calling the inventor of the Q-Link pendant a 'research scientist'.

Oh, wait, I've found her. There's a press release of her 'paper' Family Policy, Family Changes fon way-uber-there-on-the-right-wing ~~whinge~~ think tank Civitas, with the fantastically sensible title 'Family does best when governments don't try to nationalise child-rearing'.

Does anyone else think this sounds a mite tautological? Surely it could be rewritten as 'Families are the only providers of child-rearing if there are no social services to intervene in problem cases'?

But anyway the release is quite hilarious, finding as she does sensational and completely unexpected facts like 'where marriage rates are the percentage of children born into married families is lower'. Thank the gods she brought that one to my attention.

Plus this inspired quote:

Sweden is famous for its comprehensive, top-down, social engineering, which makes it difficult for people to live in any other way than that prescribed by the state.

Geenius, as Barry Shitpeas would say.

------------------------------------------------------------------
*I've decided to help the Mail out by including the speechmark at the beginning of the second paragraph that they missed out. I figure that they've already got it hard enough hitting ctrl-c and ctrl-v with whatever website/press release they got that from, what with the article already including the interesting sentence:

'The advice, produced six years agopregnancy unit'.

More Gaza-Related Worthiness. With Added Cyclists!

2009-02-18T11:55:45Z

There's a petition to ask the EU to break off it's trading relations with Israel until they agree to abide by human rights law.

It's being backed by such worthies as Alexei Sayle, Mordechai Vanunu and Clare Short. Yes, really. Anyway, link here:

http://www.thepetitionsite.com/1/Suspend-EU-Israel-Trade-Agreement

The petition will be physically delivered to the parliament in Brussels by some enthusiastic cyclists. No, really.

Sign it for the oddity alone, why dontcha?

Klaatu, Barata N-COUGH COUGH

2009-02-06T18:30:44Z

The Man, the Myth, the Boom-Stick, Bruce Campbell is interviewed by Mayo and Kermode here.

Well, what are you primitives waiting for? Do you want to kiil me or kiss me? Blow.

Oh, and there's an interview with Terry Gilliam too.

P.S. On the other blog I embedded a trailer from Army of Darkness, in case you want to relive the good old days...

Minus (with thanks to elinor)

2009-02-05T18:23:14Z

INSTRUCTIONS:
1. Put your iPod or other music player on shuffle.
2. For each question, press the NEXT button to get your answer.
3. YOU MUST WRITE THAT SONG NAME DOWN NO MATTER HOW SILLY IT SOUNDS!
4. Tag friends who might enjoy doing this as well as the person you got this from.

IF SOMEONE SAYS "IS THIS OKAY" YOU SAY?
Ion Square

WHAT WOULD BEST DESCRIBE YOUR PERSONALITY
Lenny Valentino

WHAT DO YOU LIKE IN A GUY/GIRL?
Pieces of What

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE'S PURPOSE?
Cape Cod Kwassa Kwassa

WHAT IS YOUR MOTTO?
Collecting Shields

WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS THINK OF YOU?
Cantate BWV.039 - 1. Brich dem Hungrigen dein Brot, choral
[According to Babelfish, this translates as: Break to the hungry one your bread]

WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT OFTEN?
Newborn

WHAT IS 2+2?
Matinee

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR BEST FRIEND?
No. 4 in G Major 3rd Movement: Presto
[Babelfish translates as: 'soon']

WHAT IS YOUR LIFE STORY?
Overflow

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?
Monsters in the Parasol

WHAT DO YOU THINK WHEN YOU SEE THE PERSON YOU LIKE?
Class 01 Introduction to Capital - Chapter 1: Commodities

WHAT DO YOUR PARENTS THINK OF YOU?
1st Man in Space

WHAT WILL YOU DANCE TO AT YOUR WEDDING?
Tattoo

WHAT WILL THEY PLAY AT YOUR FUNERAL?
Ruckert Lieder-Liebst du um Schonheit
[Babelfish says: You song-love Ruckert around alreadyness]

WHAT IS YOUR HOBBY/INTEREST?
The Clandestine Choir

WHAT IS YOUR BIGGEST SECRET?
Repose in Blue

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF YOUR FRIENDS?
Guys Eyes

WHAT'S THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN?
It's Great When We're Together

HOW WILL YOU DIE?
Viva

WHAT IS THE ONE THING YOU REGRET?
Future Generation

WHAT MAKES YOU LAUGH?
Swarming

WHAT MAKES YOU CRY?
The Lay of the Land

WILL YOU EVER GET MARRIED?
Tank Park Salute

WHAT SCARES YOU THE MOST?
Don't Mix Your Drinks

WHO LIKES YOU?
GSG-29

IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN TIME, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
Sweet Dreams, Sweet Cheeks

WHAT HURTS RIGHT NOW?
The Prayer

WHAT WILL YOU POST THIS AS?
Minus

Bad Vibes: Most Quotable Book Evar

2009-02-02T20:23:52Z

Can't be arsed embedding again, so here's a link.

Ways to Amuse Yourself, Vol. 1

2009-01-29T09:25:46Z

Riding on a bus from South Tyneside into Gateshead, watching the world of suburbia give way to the urban dystopia of central Gateshead whilst listening to the theme tune from The Sopranos. If Tony Soprano was English, and not a gangster, and didn't have a car, this is what his life would be like.

Man that was cool. I might do it again tonight, just for kicks.

Brilliant Headlines Vol 15

2009-01-28T11:23:30Z

Otter tours Scotland in postbag

Sorry to do a cute creature-feature, but it is a great headline, surely?

Protest the BBC's DEC Decision

2009-01-27T08:08:32Z

5.30 outside BBC North, Barack Road, Newcastle.

Called by Tyneside Stop The War Coalition and Palestine Solidarity Campaign.

I know I'll be there even if all I can do is cough at them. Please join us.

Absolutely Brilliant

2009-01-25T20:35:43Z

Bravo! Just, bravo. Direct action we can all be proud of.

Over 150 supporters of Scottish Stop the War Coalition and Palestinian groups have occupied the BBC headquarters in Glasgow. They say they will not end their occupation until the BBC has reversed its decision not to broadcast an emergency aid appeal for Gaza. The protesters are demanding to meet with a senior representative of the BBC.

Edit:
In an unforgivable breach of blogiquette, I did not give a hat-tip to Lenin. Sorry.

Update:
Intriguingly the Beeb isn't covering this, and nor is the Graun, but Sky is. Wonder why? After all, Sky aren't showing the DEC's campaign either...

Update Updated:
Switching to Sky News to see what's what, I saw Samantha Morton make a very strong and unexpected statement. Apparently, during Children in Need, Lenny Henry made a funny joke. This is pretty unprecedented, as anyone who's seen his Premier Travel Inn adverts will know. Or of course, anyone who's seen him in anything ever. Chef, anyone?

Samantha also said something about not working for the Beeb ever again unless they changed their minds, but I wasn't really paying attention after that bombshell, as you can imagine.

Updated Update Updated:
The Beeb has finally acknowledged that the occupation did take place - it was mentioned in passing at 6:35 am on the Today show. I take it all back....

Comebacks, Real and Imaginary

2009-01-24T20:56:31Z

This week has seen a few situations where I had the opportunity to come out with some good one liners. In most of these situations I held my tongue, but a couple still got out. Here's a summary:

In a role-playing exercise in a seminar we were all given characters and fictional 'comedy' names. Mine was Doctor Pfeffer-Stephens-Feffer-Stevens. The following exchange occured when the course leader wanted to address me:
Course Leader: "Did you want to say something, Doctor ... sorry I've forgotten your name -"
Me: "Just The Doctor"

Later on we were doing a series of exercises themed around Holocaust Memorial Day. The idea was that we were all members of a development committee at Channel 4. The course leader played the role of the head of C4 and gave us all a brief to develop a landmark piece of TV based around the holocaust that would fit with the station's ethos. When she threw the it open for discussion my suggestion wasn't well received, unfortunately.

"How about Justin Lee Collins in Let's Bring Back ... Birkenau" fell on stony ground. Honestly, some people wouldn't get satire if it was tied to a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick and used to beat them unconscious.*

Out on a demo to make David Miliband and John Hutton feel the full humiliation they deserve, I found myself trying to get a posh family from a nearby mansion to sign a petition called 'End the Siege of Gaza'. They claimed to be opposed to the Israeli bombardment but wouldn't sign the petition on the basis that they didn't know what they were signing. Apparently the clear, short sentence at the top of the form and my patient explanation wasn't information. Eventually it transpired that they wouldn't sign because I was from a socialist organisation and they were, to use their own term, 'righties'.

What I said in my head:
"Great, well why don't you just wait until the Tories give a fuck about it then? I'm sure they'll be organising demos of their own momentarily."

And finally, a letter from today's Weekend Magazine:

My girlfriend reckons the Guardian is a "Trotsky paper" and has it in the house under sufferance. But when I give her the magazine to read Lucy Mangan's column, I don't get it back for at least half an hour. Is there hope for Torygirl yet?
Jon Berryman
Poulton-le-Fylde, Lancashire

No Jon, because she's clearly a fucking idiot.**

*Look, it's not holocaust humour. I don't believe that jokes about mass-extermination are funny. It's a joke about the way that Channel 4 markets its documentaries (you know, The Boy With A Goat for his Testicles) and the insanity of their promotion of Lee Collins as a 'face of the channel' (i.e. distinctive brand for this multi-channel multi-platform age) which will inevitably result in his taking part in some doc that is completely inappropriate at some point in the near future.

**Leaving aside the "Trotsky paper" cretinousness, if it takes her half an hour to read Lucy Mangan's column there's a good chance she's technically in a coma.

Just in Case Anyone's Missed This - Beeb and DEC

2009-01-24T09:35:40Z

I know I'm well behind the curve here, as you can get the story from any of these excellent news nodes:
Socialist Unity
Septicisle
Enemies of Reason
Lenin's Tomb
Beau Bo d'Or
Stop the War
Tony Benn
and of course weirdly, the BBC.

Anyway, for anyone who did miss - this apart from wondering where you've been living, in a chinese pipe? - here's roughly what's happened:

Palestinians who've had their hospitals, schools, universities and UN aid buildings reduced to rubble, who've suffered the loss of 1,400 of their fellow countrymen, women and children and trying to treat 5,400 wounded. People who've seen their medical workers attacked. People who in their hundreds of thousands have no access to drinking water and food, and most of whom do not have a stable electricity supply, apparently don't constitute 'humans' enough to have their situation called a 'humanitarian crisis'.

The Disasters and Emergency Committee wanted the Beeb to carry adverts launching an appeal for Gaza, and the Beeb said that it wouldn't because it might be seen as biased. The other networks promptly used this as an excuse not to carry it either.

Presumably, in order for the Beeb to carry the ads, Hamas will need to inflict a comparable level of damage on Israel. (Note, comparing population figures for Israel to those in Gaza, I estimate that Hamas would have to kill around 6,500 Israelis and injure 25,000. Current civilian casualties in Israel from Hamas stand at 3. Time to get busy with the rockets I'm afraid, if you want any money for reconstruction!).

It is interesting to note that even the government, who have actually supplied some of the weaponry that made this disaster possible, have criticised the Beeb on this one.

Anyway, please protest to the Beeb about this. 03700 100 222.
Update: or here http://www.bbc.co.uk/complaints/complaints_stage1.shtml

Redundancies Must Be Hitting Hard at Maccy D's

2009-01-22T22:56:59Z

Overheard an ad whilst doing something more valuable to society [disgusting punchline]like giving adorable puppies Bad AIDS[/disgusting punchline]:

'... that means if you've got a pound you can get [nameless meat patty] and some change. Not much change, but some. And that's what McDonald's is all about.'

What, are they down to the work experience kid in the advertising department now?

Labradoodle puppies. Labradoodle puppies with one ear turned humourously inside out. Labradoodle puppies with one ear turned humourously inside out that keep going up to a toy with a bell in it, prodding it with their nose then running away when it makes a noise, looking confused.

But wait, that means... nooo. Wait. Can it? Yes!

2009-01-22T22:55:31Z

If Palestinians try and feed themselves,

'Israel has warned of renewed military strikes on Gaza if tunnels used for
smuggling in goods from Egypt are reopened by Palestinians.'

But uh-oh,

'some of the tunnels are already back in operation, with fuel being
smuggled in.'

But hang on, I thought

'the three week campaign had achieved all of its objectives. '

But how do we really know? How do we know that Israel has failed?

'TV images on Wednesday showed a truck being filled with petrol, apparently
smuggled in through a tunnel.'

That's right. We know that Israel has not achieved it's objectives because Palestinians are able to get trucks moving in their own country.

Hum.

By way of a postscript, remember: if an elected Palestinian government buys arms, that's smuggling. If the Israeli government buys arms, that's a valuable contribution to the British economy.

Update to PS: what Mark said. Hey, I never said it was an original point or anything...

Hopefully This Won't Be Relevant Much Longer...

2009-01-22T22:54:13Z

In the wake of Obama's ascension yesterday, anyway.

I was browsing through a book on Catholicism, as you do, and was struck by this description of one of the Spanish Inquisition's many interesting habits:

'Prisoners' hands would be tied behind their backs and their bodies then hoisted off the ground. They would be left suspended for hours or days until they were ready to 'confess' their sins. In another [torture method], the accused would be strapped to a trestle table, with their feet higher than their heads, while the priestly inquisitors would pour water down their throats.'

Go and see Moazzam Begg speak next week, I urge you.

I Have the Technolust. Widget-Gods, Slake My Thirst with Baubles

2009-01-18T13:10:25Z

Because embedding things in LJ is more of a pig than on Blogger, I'll just put the link to the post on here. Saves time.
http://leftiehippie.blogspot.com/2009/01/i-have-technolust-widget-gods-slake-my.html

One for Those of a Certain Age

2009-01-12T23:09:14Z

Anyone in less than their mid-20s will probably not realise why this is so good, but Adam & Joe's show this week saw the return of Baaaadaaad!

Podcast here.

Nigel turns up about 35 min. in, reminiscing about meeting Coolio. I tell you what, he's still got it!

'he drove like Toad of Toad Hall'

It's a really good pod this week actually, I'd highly recommend it.

Main Local Protest

2009-01-12T23:08:35Z

The other event, the big one, is a march that's being planned for this Saturday. We'll be having a bit rally at noon at the Civic Centre, then marching down to the Monument for a mass die-in and closing rally. There should be music, speeches, chanting, the works.

Anyone who can make this, please make the effort to do so. After London last week it's really important to try and keep up the momentum.

I know it seems like the Israelis are winding down - there were only 12 airstrikes last night, after all, instead of the more usual 40-60 but for some reason the death toll keeps edging upwards.

'910 people have been killed in Gaza so far, of whom 292 were children and 75 were women.'

I'll follow up with details later as things are confirmed.